"Are you engaged yet?"

This happened to me yesterday. 
 

First, a confession session is in order. I am dating someone. It’s fine.

Yesterday, a friend texted me this: “Are you engaged yet?”

This is what followed:

Emmilie: Scary. No.

Friend: Ok… then how serious is it with this guy?... Cause I’ve got a friend coming to town that you should come on a date with.
Emmilie: Um… I’m going to have to say no to that one. Sorry!!
Friend: Why not?

Emmilie: Because I have a boyfriend!

Friend: :(
Emmilie: Sorry!
Friend: So? Lol play the field. Ok… Then come “hang out” lol
Emmilie: Yeah, no.
Friend: I’ll be there with my girlfriend anyway… it’s not like I’d be like oh here Emmilie, here’s my best friend and you and he are gonna go out, he’s not a creeper. Don’t worry. What are you doing tomorrow?
Emmilie: I’ll be in San Diego.
Friend: You’re lame.

This was the real conversation. I will let you in on a secret and tell you what was going on in my head.

Friend: Are you engaged yet?
Emmilie’s Thoughts: What the heck! Why does everyone ask that? It’s been two months! You have to DATE first!
Friend: Okay…then how serious is it with this guy?...Cause I’ve got a friend coming to town that you should come on a date with.
Emmilie’s Thoughts: Are you kidding me? What a tool! Just because I’m not engaged doesn’t mean I’m looking to date anyone else!
Friend: Why not?
Emmilie’s Thoughts: BECAUSE I HAVE A BOYFRIEND!!! What the heck?!

Why is it that just because there is no ring on my finger, some people automatically assume that it can’t possibly be anything serious, or worth pursing. Isn’t there this thing called, oh I don't know, courtship? Don't you have to date before you get engaged? Why yes. Yes you do. Just because I'm not rushing into getting married doesn't mean that I'm not committed or loyal to the one I'm dating. I think that the mentality of many LDS men, and women needs a drastic change.

In fact, I celebrate couples who date for several months, even up to a year. Well done you. Do I condem those that get engaged in a matter of weeks? No. Does it concern me? Yes. I am not the kind of girl to make decisions that will alter the rest of my eternities lightly. It's fine.

I suggest that everyone in Rexburg take a deep breath, a step back and let each other live thier lives and pursue thier relationships without expecatations. Thank you.